ICYMI: A pep talk and my folks. A vid fo

ICYMI: A pep talk and my folks. A vid for the Youtube machine – http://ow.ly/AQqbH

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Damn the paps! I’m super famous now.

Today, I’m thankful for my partner, Rustin. He’s a total goof but for the last six weeks he’s hauled my ass off the grass, carpet, concrete or wherever I’ve landed because I deludedly thought my broken ear was ‘totally all better now’. If you have no idea what I’m talking about, go here.

The other night, I fell off our sleigh bed because I went looking for something under it. I got stuck spinning hopelessly with my butt and legs on my bed and my head squashed painfully into the carpet.  He hauled my top half back up onto the bed and we both laughed while my balance came back. Lifting even half of me is no easy feat. I’m not a small woman.  While we laughed and I waited for the world to stop revolving so quickly, I got to thinking about how as a couple, our roles have subtly shifted.

See, when we’re out and about, instead of me feeling all debilitated, Rustin lets me pretend that I’m super famous.  He plays the role of my handler/bodyguard.  Here are a few situations that this ‘game’ has been particularly helpful.

Heavy things to carry that upset my balance? Give them to my handler.  He’ll whisk that heavy item away.

Upon encountering an obstacle course of children, shopping carts and boxes at the grocery store, my bodyguard navigates me through the chaos as if I was swarmed by fans.

When suddenly overwhelmed by a busy environment and I’m not sure what we’re doing next?  Check with my handler – he’s got the schedule for my next appearance.

If a stranger asks me a hard question when I’m dizzy and I don’t know how to answer? Just look silently and distractedly to my handler. He intervenes quickly and with authority.

Ms. Hollywood is done answering questions today.

They always find me!

Damn the paps.

Though I’m making light of it,  all these things *have* happened in the last while.  Goofing around and pretending I’m super famous takes the edge off of me feeling so dependent. This ‘superstar’ is really glad Rustin is there.

I do hope this ‘game’ doesn’t go on forever.  Though I do enjoy the company of my handler/bodyguard, being escorted around gets boring. I’d like to navigate the store on my own, thanks.

And frankly?  The paparazzi is annoying the hell out of me.

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Me and my ‘handler’.

There you have it, another Thankful Thursday.  What are you thankful for, darling?  Do tell me in the comments below.

I read your comments and love them all.  But you knew that already, eh? Yeah.

What my secrets are…

For this edition of Thankful Thursday, I have a particular thank you to a group of people who spent a few minutes with me this past week.  On Tuesday, I was having a particularly not great day.  I asked my peeps if they had any songs that were uplifting. People came out in bunches to share things with me.  In my musical wanderings, I came across Mary Lambert’s song Secrets.  The secret that I’ve been harbouring lately is that I have a damaged nerve in my right ear that affects my balance and ability to function at full capacity.  With the help of a physiotherapist, I’m relearning to walk normally and read when looking downwards. It’s definitely getting better and I do have short periods of time now where I’m almost practically normal – otherwise, I’d never be able to write this blog post or record this video.   I also have long stretches where it’s not okay and that always disappoints me.

My islands of balance and okayness are short and exhausting but they do give me hope. I have spent so much of my summer sleeping. My doc and physiotherapist say that this is ok.  My brain and left ear are getting organized and they’re remapping stuff.  I decided to use some of my ‘ok islands’ over the last few days to say thank you and to dance around in my kitchen chair.  I can’t dance standing up yet but I will!  My recovery time has been way longer than I’d thought and though it’s hardly life threatening.  It sometimes gets me down.

For those of you already in the know, who listened sympathetically and patiently to my story and its progression this summer, or who posted tunes when I needed a lift here or on my Facebook page, I thank you. For realzies.  You never know how your actions affect others.  I’m trying to get back to normal. You’re helping. I’m grateful.

Take a peek at my goofiness:

Proper video for Mary Lambert’s ‘Secrets’:

 

How have I angered you now?

I have angered the coffee gods in some way.   I’ve been lumping along in a tenuous ‘woman vs. coffee machine’ relationship for the past six months with unfortunate results.

Here’s what happened AGAIN on Saturday morning.

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Coffee Ground Barf-O-Rama.

 

Rustin was so entertained with my cranked state that he had to take a picture.  I was less than amused.

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Big mess AND no coffee.

 

 

Here’s what gets my goat, this coffee ground ‘barf-o-rama’ doesn’t happen to anyone else when they make coffee using my machine.

Just. Me.

Why?  Why me?

I love you so much coffee and yet your makers seem to spurn my nerdy love!